Got to credit Alistair Begg for sharing this one: Two goldfish were in the fishbowl. One says to the other one “what is our exit strategy?”
After it soaks in, you realize, are we like the goldfish? Uh oh! A few ideas have come up since “safer at home” like if you were Mary the mother of Jesus – when you go to heaven are you God’s wife? Then you realize in studying the book of James that this was Jesus younger brother who became a disciple after seeing Jesus in the appearing after Jesus crucifixion. There is an amazing sermon by Alistair Begg this last resurrection sunday that brings to light the disciples that were following Jesus were on lock down after Jesus crucifixion. It’s very timely considering most of us remain at least another week or longer if opening in phases of attempting to return to some outside circulation with our communities.
Here are some humorous statements to make you laugh:
Paranoia has reached absurd stages. I sneezed in front of my laptop and and the anti-virus started a scan on its own.
I really hadn’t planned on giving up this much for Lent
I just sent a dove out my window. When it comes back with a piece of toilet paper, I will know the virus is finished.
I just finished my 90 day trial of 2020. How do I cancel?
Returned from the grocery store with the hubby. Took masks off. It turned out it was the wrong hubby. Pay attention.
Remember when we were little and had underwear with the days of the week? Those would come in handy right now.
One last finale statement:
Just be careful these days because people are going crazy from being in lock down! Actually I’ve just been talking about this with my microwave and toaster while drinking coffee and we all agreed that things are getting bad. I didn’t mention anything to the washing machine as she puts a different spin on everything. Certainly not to the fridge as he is acting cold and distant. In the end the iron straightened me out as she said everything will be fine, no situation is too pressing. But the vacuum was very unsympathetic — told me just to suck it up, but the fan was more optimistic and hope it would all soon blow over! The toilet looked a little flushed when I asked its opinion and didn’t say anything. The door knob told me to get a grip. The front door said I was unhinged and so the curtains told me to – yes, you guessed it – pull myself together. Credit to someone named Paul. Thank you for the humor.
Remember if your church was empty on Easter sunday, so was the tomb. We are not like the goldfish and Mary is not God’s wife, He made her the mother of our savior. King of the Universe doesn’t need a wife. Trinity is Father, Son, Holy Spirit, not Father, Mary, Son and Holy Spirit.